If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.
~Audre Lorde

it is only october, school is in full swing, the first set of grades have gone out, i have a firm grasp of who my students show themselves to be, and i've noticed some troubling things: the girls in my class are dangerously mean.

my female students are consumed with spreading lies and rumors about each other and fighting at the drop of the hat because someone said something wrong about them, oft times to the detriment of their schoolwork. their relationship with each other is very twisted and convoluted. my group, my intervention group, is hard to get a hold on. one day they are friends, having sleep-overs and hanging out at lunch, and the next day they are on the verge of tearing each other's hair out. it's taxing. the mean behaviors exhibited by my female students is nothing new. women have always found it difficult to get along because we are socialized to compete (for jobs, men, scholarships, etc), but it seems to be getting more and more intense, and i am not the only one who has noticed it.

in 2006, Kristen Norwood, a graduate student conducted a survey of women for her graduate thesis. this study took a look at the behavior women display toward other women they have never met. she found,

The participants freely admitted that they often feel other women are being "catty" or spiteful in a petty way toward them and admitted that they behaved the same way. They cited several reasons, the most common being jealousy over physical attractiveness and attention from men. Other reasons included competition and jealousy resulting from self-esteem issues and from perceived similarities or differences with other women.

The issue of self-esteem, or lack thereof, is a major issue in my class. i often tell my students that people who speak negatively about someone else are really just trying to mask something about themselves. to that, i've heard groans, and the usual, "i don't got nothing wrong wit me!" but their behavior and history speak otherwise. the girls in my class have a lot of issues. many have lost parents, were abused, and don't know how to really feel anything other than animosity toward others.

i have quickly learned that being a teacher also means being a psychologist and a social worker. everyday i navigate tricky emotional landmines and put out fires before they become explosive. i am struggling, though, to impart wisdom and a sense of self-worth to my female students. i know that for me, just being represented through the material in class went a long way to provide positive images of self. conversations about self, about how to deal with others, and about the options that are afforded with education are also a must, but is that enough?

how do we teach our girls, and our boys, that they are enough?

It's hard to watch or read the news from around the world and still be hopeful. With our economy in turmoil, dragged down by crippled banks and the price of fuel, I'm amazed that people are treating their economic stimulus checks like Christmas cash. I banked most of my check and the rest went toward paying Sallie Mae, but as I walked the mall yesterday I noticed it was crowded with people spending in times where it seems we should be saving.

The news from around the world is even crazier.

Two years ago I blogged briefly about the issue in Darfur & the lack of action by the West. It's amazing to me that, even after Rwanda, people have been slow to act in Sudan. China, the home of this year's Olympic games, is one of Sudan's biggest sponsors, yet we are not holding them accountable for their role in the upheaval. As my mother would say, that would be too much like right. But today, the International Criminal Court, is seriously considering issuing an arrest warrant for Sudan's president, Omar Hassan al-Bashir. Although it seems like the absolute right thing to do, nothing is ever black and white when people's lives are at stake. The UN is worried that any criminal action will anger the president and cause him to lash out at diplomats and Aid workers, who are so desperately needed. It's a precarious situation for sure, and every issue and action seems to be shrouded in shades of gray.

If you had any doubt that ISMs still exists, all you have to do is look at Ohio. I was SHOCKED to found out that a rural town in Ohio was denied water, yes WATER, because its residents were black. Although water lines were laid in 1956, residents did not receive PUBLIC WATER until 2003. Crazy, right? Read for yourself (here).

In France, a Muslim woman was denied citizenship on the grounds of "insufficient assimilation." Although she speaks the language, has children born in France, and is married to a French national, apparently she is too submissive (to her religion, to her husband, etc) to be a French citizen (read). It's easy for us (Westerners) to say that she is being oppressed by her religion or her husband because we don't understand her choices, but those are HER choices. This makes me wonder if something like this would ever happen in America. Like America, France also has the freedom of religion provision in their constitution, however this woman was denied specifically on the basis of her submission to her religion. Our president has already played fast and loose with our Constitutional rights (FISA anyone?), I wonder which one is next?

Although I am an optimist, I am also a realist. Race, class, and gender issues are still a factor in our world today. The presidential race brought many of these issues to light and forced Americans to begin having conversations on these issues, but it's clear that nothing has really been resolved.

On July 23rd and 24th, CNN will air their documentary, "Black in America." I'm interested in seeing & having conversations with you all about it. I was wondering if you'd like to have a LIVE blog event during the program? My idea is, we'd watch the program and basically converse as it's happening here in the comments section. That way we can discuss the issues as they occur to us, and receive feedback from each other. Let me know if it's a good idea and if you'd like to be involved, or if you'd like to watch the program and then talk.

be blessed.