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I am a mommy, scribe, and middle-school English teacher. I am trying to cope with being separated from my beloved. DoUWantMore? email me: theprisonerswife@gmail.com

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Showing posts with label activism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label activism. Show all posts

sunday & a poem

Sunday, April 06, 2008



untitled

our discourse ended
cut short by a synthesized voice
signaling the end. time never seems
to meander when we speak. it sprints.
running away from all the things we need
to say, as if it can only handle so much.

yesterday, the sun rose orange
and early and i pretended to wake you
kissing fingers to lips, whispering hello.
your early morning grunts overwhelm
my memory, filling me with a sense of longing

today is not starting out right.
you are not here. and you will not be
curled up inside me anytime soon.


(c) me. 2008
~~
i spoke to beloved yesterday for the first time in a week. he is...ok, all things considered. still having issues with the COs, so it looks as though i will have to move further into advocate mode. i am learning so much about what it truly means to be committed. i never thought this would be my life. even joked with him that i'd totally NOT stick by his side had he ever found himself on the wrong side of a prison, but life changes. five years, and a son later, this is our life....FOR NOW. *sigh*

last night i went to a party for the first time in YEARS. when i say party, i don't mean a gathering of boho types listening to jazz & reciting love jones quotes (oh, you know what i'm talkin bout!), i mean a Divine 9, KAPsi frat party. back in the day, my sands and i were ALWAYS at the center of attention at these parties. we strolled deep, (innocently) flirting with frat and just having a good time. last night officially sealed it: i'm old LOL. i didn't even know HALF of the new sorors who were there, and the Nupes...they were way more energetic than i remembered. i had a good time though. i was still able to keep up with the Neos, learned a few new strolls, and enjoyed seeing people i haven't seen in years.

how was your weekend?

& don't forget to share your poems in the comments section. shout out to LoveBabz & Stephen Bess for posting poems for National Poetry month!

Posted by the prisoner's wife On 7:00 PM 8 comments

Teaching in the Trenches

Wednesday, March 05, 2008



My classroom is a battleground.

Everyday I fight with my students, trying to get them to remember bits of grammar, vocabulary words, and find importance in the works of literature that have changed my life. Everyday I threaten, and sometimes, I bribe them into learning (I hope) what it is they need to know to be just a little bit successful in this world. And everyday, after a day of threatening, and bribing, and yelling, and calling people’s parents, and shaking my head, I come home tired and spent, barely able to stay up longer than my 2-year old, only to return in the morning to do it all over again.

Teaching is a venerable profession.

Many have tried to tame a classroom, but have failed miserably, only to quit, disgruntled and complaining about the kids after a year or two. I won’t front, the idea of quitting and abandoning the headache (and heartache) of the classroom has crossed my mind plenty of times. But where will that leave my kids?

My students are a special group. Many of them are functioning three and four grade-levels below where they should be. They are facing a myriad of issues that no one their age should face. Several have no parents, are in foster care or live with distant relatives who do little but collect their check. And most of them come from single-parent households, where mom or grandma is working so hard she can barely pay attention. My students are both too grown for their 13 years, and too immature to handle all that has been placed on their shoulders.

Dangerous minds are wasting away.

I admit, I wanted to be the next Joe Clark or Erin Gruwell, the next inspirational teacher leading my group of disenfranchised students to the Promised Land (and maybe a movie), but that is proving to be harder than I imagined. You see, I thought that if I was real with the kids, showed I cared about them, and demonstrated that anything was possible, that education was the ticket out of any messed up situation, that they’d hunker down and study until As and Bs blossomed like wildflowers. But that isn’t happening.

Several of my students are apathetic, at best, toward their education. They don’t see the value in math or science or learning how to write an essay. They can’t see how it will help them further down the line. They know college is out there, but to my dismay, many have expressed interest in NOT going. My kids are bored, and only seem to be turned on by Soulja Boy and Sidekicks, by MySpace and name-brand clothing. Getting them interested in school is harder than cracking the Matrix, and I’m still searching for the code.

I am afraid for my students.

I am afraid for our future. Without an education, my students—Black and Latino—are almost certainly doomed to struggle for the rest of their lives. A 2006 article in the NY Times writes,

...in the country's inner cities, the studies show, finishing high school is the exception, legal work is scarcer than ever and prison is almost routine, with incarceration rates climbing for blacks even as urban crime rates have declined.
Although the problems afflicting poor black men have been known for decades, the new data paint a more extensive and sobering picture of the challenges they face.

"There's something very different happening with young black men, and it's something we can no longer ignore," said Ronald B. Mincy, professor of social work at Columbia University and editor of "Black Males Left Behind" (Urban Institute Press, 2006) (more).


My Black male students seem especially disinterested in excelling in school, choosing instead, to hide behind an air of coolness and hyper masculinity. Instead of emulating positive examples of blackness, they choose to model their stance and pose and language after many of the (worst) rappers in the business. And it’s very frustrating.

As someone who was where they are, growing up in the same neighborhood and experiencing many of the same things, it’s frustrating to see so many falling into habits that can trap them into a life that they are not ready for. To see them falling into this life that is so totally avoidable and unnecessary is painful. But even more painful is not having the answers. There is no magic pill or bullet to turn this thing around. There have been studies upon studies conducted, but still, our kids are underachieving.

How do we fix this?

How can we save our kids?

Posted by the prisoner's wife On 10:55 PM 6 comments

Gangbanging, A Mental Illness?

Monday, October 22, 2007

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Posted by the prisoner's wife On 6:45 PM 5 comments

Black Thursday

Thursday, September 20, 2007



oh how i love black people, young people, and ALL people. how did you spend your Black Thursday?

the little one and i donned all black in solidarity with the cause. i made sure i bought him a black t-shirt last night, just so he could support the movement, even if he didn't understand what was going on. these boys could easily be my son, our son.


(the fliers posted in my classroom)

wednesday, i briefly mentioned the Jena 6 to my students. i was pleasantly surprised when many of them knew SOME, albeit wrong, information about the situation. when i realized HOW confused their information was, i set out to help them to understand the gravity of the situation and how it affects them. i put together a short powerpoint explaining the Jena 6, the significance of nooses & how lynching was used to terrorize blacks, and in particular black males.

they sat in awe.

i saw their questioning faces look up at me for answers. why would anybody HATE in such a way? kids are funny, full of the ideologies of their parents. last year i was frustrated when my attempt at a discussion about the juvenile justice system spiraled into a bunch of missed points. but today...the points were not missed.

during the course of our discussion some of my kids went from completely ignorant, to hating whitey, to hearing & knowing that ALL people (black or white) are not just one way. see, we have to be careful not to get our youth SO riled up they begin to carry around their own brand of hate. i made them remember those (non-minorities) that love and care for them, and then we were cool. we moved from helplessness to empowerment as we wrote letters to the Governor of Louisiana (i will be mailing them tomorrow).

i am so proud of everyone who sacrificed their time & energy to this cause. i am proud of my students and their young, precious, BRILLIANT minds.

today was a GREAT day
but we can't stop
here.

Posted by the prisoner's wife On 7:17 PM 4 comments

FUCK THAT: The Media BLACKout

Tuesday, September 18, 2007



Warning: if you are offended by the n-word & expletives, this post ain't for you. proceed.

BLACK radio is doing it! there is an air of protest and youth-activism that we haven't seen in YEARS. If it weren't for black radio's on air personalities (Michael Baisden, Steve Harvey, and Tom Joyner to name a few) & black bloggers around the globe, many of us would be completely in the dark about the plight of the Jena 6.

I am an avid news/news magazine junkie and I have YET to see a story of substance regarding the Jena 6 on ANY mainstream news outlet. Over the weekend there was a BRIEF story (about 2 minutes) about the Jena 6 on MSNBC because one of the anchors was interviewing Al Sharpton, but other than that...silence.

I am at a loss at why the media chooses to BLACKout the racial issues that continue to plague America. The MSNBC anchor had the audacity to ask Rev. Sharpton if "deep seeded racism" still exists in "pockets" around the country. ummm, HELLO!? sometimes i wonder what planet most white people live on (anybody? explain?). racial inequities continue to exist in the media, in our education system, in our cities, and let's not get me started on the VAST inequalities in the justice system. over 40 years after we marched on Washington, Selma, and Watts...Marvin Gaye (RIP) is still wondering WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?


(phil spector's crazy ass & oj's dumb ass...a media match made in heaven)

The media's lack of coverage is troubling, especially in light of the stories they choose to cover. Michael Vick was all the rage for a while, now it's OJ's turn. *shakes head* I wish OJ would go into a hole and sit down somewhere. this fool, makes Chris Rock's "black people vs. niggas" routine all the more relevant. i'm with Chris...i love black people....but...



I HATE NIGGAS!

and OJ is the coon-ing-ist (yeah, i made that up) ass NIGGA on the block! Damn! even crazy ass Phill Spector, who blew this white chick's brains out, can't even take his shine. OJ has to be fuckin delusional. how a nigga gon' run his own "sting" operation without that shit going awry? how can he NOT realize white people (and now black people) HATE his guts and want to see him wearing prison blues? get ready Orenthal....you're about to be inmate #1234567, a ward of the State of Nevada. bend over, nigga.

*sigh*

i hope i don't sound crazy, i'm just angry. and black. i'm not paranoid either. hundreds of years of oppression have colored my stance on things. being a teacher, a facilitator of young black minds comes with a whole host of responsibilities. i feel as though it is my DUTY to shed light on the plight of our kids. these random news stories are merely distractions. we need to focus our attentions on the Jena 6. many of you probably won't make it to the rally on Thursday (i will be at work telling my students about this), BUT we have been asked (and i am asking you) to wear BLACK on Thursday to show your support for the Jena 6.


(i *heart* mos def & cornell west...preach brovas!)


read up on the plight of the Jena 6, write a check, tell somebody....DO SOMETHING...

please.

Posted by the prisoner's wife On 8:05 PM 9 comments

Black Men Are Safer In Prison

Saturday, September 15, 2007



Black men are America's most likely crime victims. Even Latino men, who suffer high homicide rates, are much less likely than black men to be murdered. A black man is safer in prison today than living free in Los Angeles County.


*jaw drops*

THIS scares me.

According to the Los Angeles Time Homicide Report, a weekly tally of all the homicides in LA Country, young, black men are safer in prison than walking the streets of LA. I am shocked, appalled, and afraid, especially for my bothers & son.

where have i been?

i am an 80s baby. i grew up in the heart of South-Central LA in the 80s, lived through gang wars & colors, and I suppose, i figured everything had died down. nowadays, when my students come to me refusing to write in anything EXCEPT blue ink, spelling my name wrong ON PURPOSE because they refuse to put the "C and K" together, and claiming they are from "such and such set," I shake my head and can't understand. for some strange reason I thought gang bangin was dead, burried deep in our memories right next to Cube's jeri curl & Raiders jacket. But apparently it's still alive and well in the hearts and mind of our youths.

This year Six Hundred & Seven people have been murdered in Los Angeles County. 607. of those, 180 (or 17%) have been Black Males. An overwhelming majority of them (156) met their demise by the way of a gun.

I don't even know where we can begin to change this (suggestion?).

I'm sure these statistics aren't foreign to other major cities. where do we begin to pick of the pieces of our broken youth? In 2005-06 many news sources did several news reports on the state of Black men in America, but I have yet to read or hear anything about the brothas this year. Perhaps our men are out of style; overshadowed by celebrity gossip and political scandals. But the question remains...what can we do about it?

How do we begin saving ourselves, because it is OBVIOUS, no one else will do it for us. Where do we even begin?

Personally, I am starting with my son. My son has a living, breathing example of how bad decisions & choices can really cause setbacks in your life (his father). beloved and I talk, at length, about our hopes and dreams for our son and how no matter what, he will NOT make the same mistakes we've made.

my son will not be statistic
God Willing
we can keep him safe
long enough to succeed

UPDATE:
Since posting yesterday, the number has gone up to 620! this is damn ridiculous.

Posted by the prisoner's wife On 5:52 PM 10 comments

two sides of a coin

Thursday, May 31, 2007




damaged collateral

I.
yesterday joseph came
home       draped in crimson
muslin smelling       gentle
          white lotus leaves
bowing underfoot

they call him hero
help him
          into the cadillac
hoist old glory
and play riffles
like trumpets in a parade

was it worth it?
               mother sobs
was it worth it?
               we all wonder      angry

he came home
like this

II.
fireworks paint the sky
      orange
               red
                    a ghastly purple
Mosul erupts           a cacophony
of women and wailing
babies struck down

without uttering a sound
we watch
seduced by the blood
pooling silently
beneath our feet

Posted by the prisoner's wife On 9:38 PM 7 comments